As my life is beginning to take shape now, things are becoming clearer and clearer. Space, time, objectives, labor, women, money, happiness, and reaching my full potential. Over the last week, I’ve been trying to get a head start on my algebra class which starts on Saturday. Every evening, when I come home, there is work that needs to be done. The dishes need to be put up, dishes need to be washed, dinner needs to be made, laundry needs to be done, folding of the clothes needs to be done. I was able to work on a few problems. In put them into my computer program to do later as exercises. Then I was tired. I needed to take a nap before I had to wake up and get my roommate. I lost another $100.00 trading. I promised myself that I would read more about trading before trading again. Reading needs to be done. I want to get my thoughts down on paper. Blogging needs to be done. And it’s 11:30 p.m. now. Imagine trying to fit a relationship in my schedule now. Impossible. What am I aware of? That making money isn’t easy. That it take time and energy to develop a new skill to earn more money. That life isn’t meant to be fair. And there is no such thing and kindness and love. That whatever I choose to do, I need to be satisfied with that. I’m never going to find the love I envision because it doesn’t exist. These are my thoughts and today is January 19th, 2010.