Creating a life of Happiness, Health, Peace of Mind and Contribution

I woke up this morning with a hangover of depression from yesterday. I can I achieve a life of happiness? What am I looking to achieve? I sat in Borders reading my African-American history book to get jump start on my classes that start tomorrow. As soon as I walked in, I heard the Isley Brother’s song “Fight the Power” playing on the overhead speakers. I immediately broke out in a dance. I made the cashiers smile. After I sat down to read my book, enjoy my morning’s coffee, I began to think of the things that make me happy. The idea light came on. That’s it. Fill your life with things that make you happy. So, from that point, I decided to make a list of the things that bring me joy, and fill my life with those things daily. Here’s my list.

Things that make me happy.

• Listening to music
• Making music
• Singing
• Writing
• Reading
• Interacting with people
• Painting
• Meeting new people
• Photography
• Making people laugh
• Learning new things
• Traveling to new places
• A great relationship
• Good intellectual conversations

Contributions

• Making Music
• Sharing my life experiences
• Marking Art
• Sharing photographs
• Sharing different perspectives to help people
• Teaching what I know to help people succeed

Piece of Mind

• Becoming Debt free
• Becoming Financially independent
• Creating substantial savings to weather any economic storm
• Profitable investments
• Creating profitable businesses

Health

• Eating Healthy
• Exercising
• Yearly check-ups

I’m making a committment to create my life based on these ideas, and concepts that I make my own.

Yesterday I worked a full day. Afterwards, I attended a meet-up group for Photoshop lovers. We met at the Museum of Contemporary Art. I was the first to arrive. Anna was the organizer. We got to know each other briefly until Manny, a new Chicagoan arrived. We waited until 6:15 p.m. to start our tour. The last time I was at the M.C.A. was almost 4 years ago. It was a different experience as an artist. I see the art quite differently. Overall, I had a wonderful time. I think I’ll go to more Meet-up groups this week before school starts.

It looks as if I’m retreating back to self. I’m feeling the need to be very withdrawn now. I want to entertain my thoughts with no interruptions or dilutions for anyone else. After getting back from my date yesterday, I’ve concluded that the quest for love should be buried forever.  There is no point in looking for companionship.What is important is that I live to experience life on my own accord. The solutions and answers to my problems can’t be found from someone else. I must create the solutions. And it can’t be resolved without work. Work away from work. There is no resting or relaxing. There is no looking to have a good time. After school finishes in December, it’s back to work for me. First order of business is to pay back Uncle Sam.

I’m afriad that is is about as good as it gets. I spent today cleaning, making space to paint this afternoon. By 2:00 p.m. I started my Tom Browne painting project. I spent 3 1/2 hours painting. After I finished, I reflected on what I had accomplished. I started thinking about my photograph I took. I thought about my date tommorrow. I thought about my financial circumstances. I thought about the people I call my friends. I thought about my job. Yes, this is as good as it is going to get.

First Sitting 3 1/2 hours

I find myself is the strangest place again. I have many things that will keep me busy, but I find it a struggle to start any activity. Tonight, I had two events that I wanted to go to. An art exhibit and my old singing teacher’s performance at the Drake hotel. When I got home at 3:30 p.m., I had to call the I.R.S. I was finally able to resolve my tax problem. At least for a year. I then had to rush out the house to pay my phone bill. When I got home, it was 5:00 p.m. I took a nap, when I was suppose to wash clothes. I didn’t wash clothes. Time kept rolling along. I bought a canvas to start a new painting. But that would require me to clean and make some space. I just didn’t feel like it. I struggled to make a call to a woman I met a few weeks back at the South Shore Jazz Festival. I had to tell myself before I made the call; Don’t say anything negative, stay positive and upbeat. Forget about your problems. Don’t mention anything heavy. You need to make new friends. You need to expand your circle. I had to fight the thought of that loud voice saying, “It’s not the time to start building a relationship.” But I can only think of how I want my life to be. And if I don’t try and create something, I’ll be singing the same old sad love song of being lonely when I’m fifty. I realize life is short. Too short to not have a meaningful relationship. I can’t die that way.

My financial life is a disaster again. My tax problem created a few more problems. One with the landlord. Now, I’m finding myself having to move. I’m trying not to feel any guilt as to all the money I owe him. This is more about survival than it is trying to do what is ethically correct. And my problems have really no immediate solution. Discussing it with anyone only will fall on deaf ears. Writing is my only release. I know that I’ll come out of this but not without hurting someone who has helped me through my financial struggles. I’m thinking more like a business person. Business fall behind in payments when cash flow decreases for them. They layoff. They have unpaid debts. And even go into bankrupcy. But it’s not personal. It’s just business. I have to develop more of a mindset like this so I can survive and come out on top rather than leaving with my tail between my legs.

President of USAction William McNary

Illinois Govenor Pat Quinn

Congresswoman Jan Schakowsky

Illinois State Treasurer Alexi Giannoulias

Practice

Jazz Piano – Left Hand page 2, 1st measure of exercise # 1

Tonight I’m starting my musical journey.

Practice

• 1st measure in Jazz Hanon
• Jazz Chord Guitar Bible – Basic Major exercieses 1-5 @ 50 metronome.
• Circle of 5th C, F, B flat, E flat – First chord in exercise 1.