As I muse over last week class discussions and reading of Emerson’s essays, I can’t help but to look even further to when I first started the semester. I remember how we, as an entire class, stood up in the center of the room, rotated in a circle, stopped, and had very quick conversations with each other.  That was supposed to be an example of philosophy. At the time, I didn’t understand the meaning of the exercise. I walked out of class that day discounting it as being purely Romper Room child’s play. However, every week, I’m finding that exercise, to be a vivid illustration of what philosophy really is.

                British philosopher, Bertrand Russell wrote, “It follows to that if several people are looking at the table at the same moment, no two of them will see exactly the same distribution of colours, because no two can see it from exactly the same point of view, and any change in the point of view makes some change in the way the light is reflected.” Every week, I see Russell’s ideas and thoughts being validated from hearing my classmates give their feedback from our weekly readings.  Every new voice that shares a perspective in class becomes that new dawn that rises at mid-noon that Emerson so eloquently wrote about. The circle finds itself a new parameter. I’m listening, yet learning at the same time to other perspectives that aren’t my own.  As I listen, the imaginary voice that I’ve created of Socrates rings in my ear, “You know nothing.” His voice reminds me of the arrogance displayed by Euthyphro.  I find myself surrendering the keys on a perspective of life that I never really owned. My art isn’t the only art hanging on the wall now. My music isn’t the only music being played. I now listen and watch in admiration the different descriptions of life’s distributions of colors.

                I can’t remember how many times, over the years, I’ve heard the phrase uttered from women, “All men are jerks!” Coincidently, I can’t seem to remember any film that amplified that phase so loudly until I watched “Thelma and Louise.” If there was a social message that Callie Khouri was trying to deliver, she successfully packaged a negative image of American men, from beginning to end, for women across the America to embrace.

                The image of Thelma’s husband, Darryl (Christopher McDonald) is one of an insensitive, foul-mouthed, egotistical, control freak who shows no appreciation towards his loving wife.  Khouri creates the image of Darryl before he has even entered the scene. Louise (Susan Sarandon) becomes agitated about the fact that Thelma (Geena Davis) hasn’t asked Darryl if she could go on a road trip with Louise. This dialog sets up the relationship between Thelma and Darryl, even before he has had a chance to be introduced in the film. Thelma’s character is illustrated as being a submissive and fearful housewife. The characterization of Darryl is built upon in the next scene when he walks about of the bedroom, using foul-mouthed profanity, to express his disdain in the way she communicates with him.

                Khouri continues her negative theme of men when she introduces Harlan (Timothy Carhart.) Harlan plays a young, friendly, sweet-talking, comical, attractive guy who they both meet in a local bar on the first stop of their road trip. Harlan begins to unveil his true, male identity when he appears to take advantage of Thelma by spinning her around on the dance floor to the point that she becomes dizzy. Harlan makes a suggestion to Thelma that she’s in need of some “fresh air.” He then escorts her outside in the parking lot. It is in the parking lot, where Khouri displays men as a being insensitive, uncaring, selfish-natured, and sexually aggressive as Harlan attempts to rape Thelma.

                Throughout the entire film, narratively and visually, Khouri portrays men as being evil natured creatures. J.D. (Brad Pitt) is a young, attractive man that Thelma meets and becomes attractive to. J.D. however, has a criminal history, which, both Thelma and Louise aren’t immune from being affected by.  While driving, the trucker that they meet alongside the highway is portrayed as a sexual pervert, who displays his own sexual interest to Thelma and Louise. The restaurant day manager, who jokingly expresses his interest with Thelma running away with him isn’t spared Khouri’s negative characterizations either. If Khouri’s goal was to unify and expose the secret image of men held by a vast majority of women across America; Mission Accomplished.

                While reading Emerson’s essays, “History” and “Self-Reliance”, a common characteristic started to emerge between Emerson, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., and Socrates. They were all men who broke away from populace thinking. Emerson, like King and Socrates, wanted to agitate, with a purpose, the minds of common people. For example, Emerson writes, “Man is timid and apologetic; he is no longer upright; he dares not say “I think,” I am,” but quotes some saint or sage.” Emerson gives an insightful view of his prospective of society. It reminded me of the cartoon with two cavemen. Both are standing there with two stones, but one of the cavemen has a brighter idea. He chisels away the four edges of this huge stone, twice his size, in order to make it easier to move.

                I started making a connection between all three philosophers when Emerson wrote, “Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh.” Emerson makes a comparison to Socrates and Jesus the same way King made references to them in his letter entitled, “Letter from Birmingham Jail.” King wrote, “Jesus, Amos, Paul, Martin Luther, John Bunyan, Abraham Lincoln, and Thomas Jefferson as being called extremist too.” Coincidently, both men felt a likeness to Jesus and Socrates as being misunderstood and extremist.

                King, Emerson, and Socrates appear to have had a low threshold for complacency. This characteristic is displayed when Emerson writes in his essay, Self-Reliance, “I hope in these days we have heard the last of conformity and consistency” Dr. King makes mention of “weeping” from the laxity he had seen from the church in regards to their  lack of involvement in segregation.  King gives insight to his low tolerance for being complacent when he justifies his reasons for coming to Birmingham. He writes, “Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. Never again can we afford to live with the narrow, provincial “outside agitator” idea.”

                Socrates was both an extremist and misunderstood among his peers, just as King and Emerson were. Both King and Emerson seem to connect themselves to being like Socrates and other outspoken men in history. They all seem to have had a passion for sharing their new ideas and way of thinking even with those who couldn’t embrace them.

Here is another list of unfamilar words in Emerson’s essay entitled, “Self-Reliance.”

• Admonition
• latent
• naught
• lustre
• bard
• firmament
• providence
• connexion
• aspirant
• Prattle
• Piquancy
• Hark
• Conciliate
• Cumber
• eclat
• Lethe
• Absolve
• suffrage
• titular
• ephemeral
• capitulate
• Pule
• Lintels
• alms
• sot

I began reading Emerson’s Essay for my philosophy class. Because of the time it was written, I found it quite challenging to first read due the vocabulary used during this time. I thought I would go back a second time and create a list of unfamiliar words so others might use as a reference guide for their reading as well.

• Inlet
• Explicable
• Epoch
• Centrifugal
• Centripetal
• Odious
• Alcibiades
• Proteus
• Catiline
• Solomon
• Inviolable
• Sacerdotal
• stoic
• lineament
• accost
• discourse
• Oracle
• Annals
• ether
• angularity
• manipular
• martyrdom
• proxy
• Belzoni
• Catacombs
• pedants
• ere
• metempsychosis
• mutable

Last week, I was totally unprepared for two quizzes. The first quiz was in my philosophy class. That same day, I had another quiz in my film class. By the time my film instructor handed my quiz, I was so frustrated, tired, and disappointed with my unpreparedness, that I handed my quiz to my instructor with only my name on it, and left class early. When I finally arrived home, I took out my film book and started reading. I read until 11:00 p.m.

When the weekend arrived, I tried to see where I allocated my time. Friday, after my main job, I worked my second part-time job from 2:00 p.m. until 9:00 p.m. I arrived at home around 10:00 p.m. too exhausted to study.

Saturday morning, I got up at 5:00 a.m. to read the four Emerson’s essays assigned by my philosophy class. It took four hours to complete his thirty page History essay. The challenges I faced during this four-hour period were, the new radiator pipe leak from the apartment directly above me that was pouring rain inside the corner of my apartment, my mind wanting to think about events, the new words that the 19th century writer expects me to know, and my hunger. I do give in to breakfast which takes away time from that four hour block. Below is a picture of the damage that the radiator leak caused.

At 9:00 a.m, I had to start cleaning to be able to comfortably let my landlord in to see this damage. This took an hour. At 10:00 a.m., I had run some errands. At 11:00 a.m., I had to leave for work. From 12:00 a.m. until 7:45 p.m. I worked my other part-time job. I arrived at home around 8:30 a.m. just tired. I had a 2nd, unreturned phone call waiting left by my dad who left one early in the week. I cooked dinner for myself. By 9:30 p.m. I was dead tired, so I went to sleep.

Today I have to read three at least two chapters in my film book, start writing my week’s philosophy paper, read three more chapters of Emerson’s essays, grocery shop, clean, do laundry and possibly have a few short conversations with a few friends. I have about 13 hours to accomplish all these task. Luckily for me, tomorrow is a holiday and I have no school. So I’m going to take advantage of that.

First Art Project Finished

I was able to finish my first oil painting from my art class. Here are the pictures of the still-life and my painting.

Picture of still life

First oil painting.

I thought I was smart, sly even. I had found an audio reading of Plato’s Euthyphro on the internet. I was looking for anything to assist me in getting through, what seemed like, at the moment, a difficult dialog reading. Not only did I find a complete, forty-minute audio reading, but also several websites that offered interpretation of the dialog between Socrates and Euthyphro. And to strengthen my knowledge, I researched the history on Socrates.

After listening to the entire mp3 audio file, carefully taking notes along the way, I thought I had a good grasp of the ideas and lessons in Plato’s Euthyphro. I acquired a sense of confidence that I would bring to class and proudly display to my classmates. I was prepared.  Call me an expert even. Besides that, I knew from reading Plato’s dialog, what lesson I had learned for the week. And I couldn’t wait for the moment to share them with everyone. But my real lessons for the week would begin when our class began a closed reading of Euthyphro.

As soon as the first words rolled off the tongue of my fellow students, both Euthyphro and Socrates began to take a new life. It was an amalgam of my instructor’s knowledge of Socrates, Plato, Greek History, along with my classmate’s interpretations that started altering my vision of Socrates. The impression I had of Socrates, the one portrayed in the audio reading, was not a man of sarcasm, but one who had a serious disposition.  And Euthyphro was certainly not a man of arrogance. He was confident, just like me. Wait. Am I showing the characteristics of Euthyphro by thinking I have all the answers? Could I be arrogant in thinking that there wouldn’t be anything I could possibly have learned today? Oh my GOD, I’m just like Euthyphro! This was the first lesson I learned that day in class.

The second lesson would come shortly before the class ended. My professor shared with the class one of Socrates famous quotes, “I know that I know nothing.”  At this point, I’m in a sober state. It’s like that experience you get sometimes when you’re attending church and you think the pastor’s sermon is directed at only you. I just sat there, in silence, reflecting on my own arrogance and the wisdom of Socrates as class continued to read Euthyphro.

This morning, as I put my final thoughts on paper, I’m beginning to wonder if this is the real lesson that Plato was teaching through this dialog. Was Plato trying to show the arrogance knowledgeable men display? All I know is that I really don’t know.

Yesterday I tried to squeeze in a day as much as I could; homework, work, and finally, to end the day, sitting in a coffeehouse to draw. By the time I reached the coffeehouse they were ready to close. So, I went home, only to fall asleep shortly after I arrived.

Yesterday represented a day of my life. What was I trying to accomplish? What was motivating me? What were the reasons that I choose to fill  my weekend with those activities? These questions, I have pondered for forty-four years, were resolved. A conclusion has been reached. Finally, I can idle my internal thinking machine and move on with life.

The Personal Experience

Each morning I get up to blog. I share my personal thoughts and experiences for the world to see. Why do I this strange ritual each morning? Because of the experience it gives me. What was I doing searching for a coffeehouse at 8:00 p.m. just to be able to draw in? I could easily achieved this at home. I conclude that it is the personal experience of sitting among strangers, the aroma and taste of other coffee bean blends, and being able to sit down and draw something new.

What about homework? What motivated me to get up and do this activity? It is part of the larger experience of wanting to go back to school. Homework is a small portion of the experience. But what has motivated me to go back to school? What experience was I trying to have here? There are multiple reasons, which lead me to into taking action at my age. These experiences include, being able to have better job opportunities and earn more money. The experience of having classmates, homework, an instructor, and being able to share my school experience with others in the workplace. The experience of being knowledgeable and confidently talking about subjects of interest with other people. And lastly, being able to discover and experience new passions and  possibly a new career.

What about work? What motivated me to fill my Saturday with work? What experience was I trying to have? Work allows me to experience a sense of stability. It keeps me in a comfortable place to stay. I’m able to experience the joys of eating without the effort of trying to grow my own food. Work is how I contribute to the system. I exchange my time for the experience of receiving money. And if managed wisely, I can experience a surplus of money rather than having the experience of living in a debt.

As I rode the bus yesterday on the way home, I observed each passenger. I thought about where they had just come from and where they were headed. What had they just experieced today? Was it a new movie release, a tour of Harold Washington Culture Center, shopping for new shoes at Macys,  enjoying a bag of Garrett’s popcorn, a bike ride along Lake Michigan, or a simple day walking around downtown Chicago? We all are motivated by our personal human experience.

I’ve pretty much have a normal routine now, going to work, school, and my photography mentorship throughout the week. For the most part, all homework must be done over a weekend, starting Friday afternoon. My schedule is too tight to attempt to do homework during the week. Yesterday, I had a chance to finish up my oil painting project.

One of the things I’ve noticed as a college student is my increased interaction with younger people. It sometimes feels as if I’m completely out of place. For example, last night I found myself defending my work ethic with one of my co-workers. D.J. is a 19 year old college student who isn’t your typical 19 year old. I find him to be a pretty intelligent person to converse with. During one of our conversations we had last night, he made mention to the fact that I didn’t want to work . This was in reference to me coming into work for Saturday. That threw me for a loop. I had to ask him what he meant by that. As I listened to him give examples of my lack of desire to work, and poor work ethic, D.J.’s youth and inexperience in life started to unveil itself.  There I was, defending my thirty-two year work history to a nineteen year old. I had to ask myself, “Why?”